Vorpal Tales started their new Scarred Lands awesomely brutal adventure by Onyx Path Publishing on Fridays, @10pm Eastern!

In the city of Urlisian, we begin with Garr, who has come to give last rights to the dead man Salazar Papadopoulos, the captained of the guards brothers favorite street musician. In order to properly perform the ceremony, he needs to gather a large number of people. He goes to the local tavern the knob goblin to get this crowd. Well there, and acquaintance of his L’Malthun, assists him, by Rube Goldberging the popular guy of the tavern, Piater, awake. When he wakes up, he is convinced by Garr, well mostly by his dwarven ale, to go to the temple of Idra for the service. Piater takes the whole bar with him in a group to the temple, with promises of his home made dwarven style ale. While they procession of drunks is heading to the temple, Garr sees one of the local guards, Scott, manhandling an asaatthi (Ssyusa), and by proximity, a manticora(Terhana). Scott sees what the paladin is doing, and hands off his “captives” to Garr to deal with, and joins the procession with beer in mind. Garr gathers everyone into the temple and performs the service with few interruptions, primarily due to Piater’s assistance, as using drunks for a service in the style of Idra is seemingly a common tactic. With a semblance of order, everyone goes up to the open casket to give their regards, and kiss the body on the forehead. Later in the service, L’Mathun gives an amazing eulogy in nothing but Drendali gibberish.
Following the service, everyone realizes they were slightly swindled by the paladin, who gives one cask of ale to Piater, who is told to dole out the alcohol as he sees fit. Just as it seems a fight might break out and order to take the alcohol from Piater, he opens the door to find a festival has been created… For Salazar day. Before leaving the temple, Garr gives an extra service to one of the three people in attendance who actually came for Salazar, and Terhana robs the corpse. Finding one gold piece, and a mithril tooth, she only can make off with the gold, as the tooth is attached too well to remove without being noticed. Despite poor introductions between L’Malthun and Terhana, with the assistance of Ssyusa and Garr, they fully introduce each other, and realize Scott was mostly just hassling the two because they are not human. Having gotten off Scott free for attending the funeral, the group make their way into the newly formed Salazar day festival.

While this is going on, Yinei is closing in on the city, the first of its kind they have ever seen. Upon drawing near to the city Yinei recalls the last conversation they had with a maternal character in their life, Caelynn, Yinei explains that they must leave the forest to find a way to deal with their “curse”, the forced gender role they have been ascribed. Upon coming up to the gate, Yinei hears all of the commotion from the city, and it’s new festival. They make their way inside, after dealing with the gate guards, who the lazily finalized their job to go party for Salazar day. When going for some food, Yinei’s innocence of the world almost caused them to massively overpay for a meal by trading a pristine wolf pelt for a meal. Luckily for them, the woman, Muriel, couldn’t be that wretched as to take so much from someone so naive, settling upon a lesser rabbit pelt.

The group with Garr split up, and while Terhana goes to fight in wagered matches, and handedly takes everyone out until Piater is her opponent, who still has no chance. Garr and Ssyusa both fail spectacularly at a drinking competition, while L’Mathun watches everyone, and Yinei doesn’t get swindled more. As the night is winding down, a storyteller comes and tells the tale of how the four winds were captured. Almost immediately after his story is completed, someone comes up and stabs the storyteller. Only after the assailant is removed, and killed, do we realize this is in fact the man we just held a eulogy for.

Thus ending session one, with many questions and bodies, hopefully with a clue as to why this just happened.

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